Nicole
Author's posts
Aug 28
More Erin with Video
Woke up with the elephant on my chest again. I actually woke thinking of her several times during the night. I’m not up for watching this yet today, but it is one of my favorites to show you her personality. It was done in the backseat of the van sometime this past year (2014). She …
Aug 27
Stuff
Erin and Anna Kate’s favorite Barbies to play with. L to R: Joseph, Tiffany, Elizabeth, Sharpay, Abby, Hannah, Kelly, Lauren, and Tyler. They had an entire fictional storyline that they played with these guys. I will miss them, but thought Anna Kate would enjoy them more. Woke …
Aug 26
More Art
Some more artwork I found. I hope you can see the detail on this one. Simone Howley came and gave Erin a drawing book on the Thursday after she had her first surgery (Thursday July 24) I think. Anyway, when we came home I …
Aug 26
Various Artwork and Such
This is what I have handy of Erin’s artwork and stuff. This was what she drew for Shaun this past Father’s Day 2014. She and I colored in a solar themed mandala on …
Aug 26
Memories
As I suspected, I became very depressed last night again. It was involuntary. I was sitting there and it came over me like a wave. I really was not able to get out from in under it before I went to bed, and it is coming back now. When I wake in the morning, I …
Aug 25
Rays of Hope
So far, I have written two posts on grief and pain that I chose not to publish. I may do so one day but it isn’t necessary right now. I realize that those of you reading have chosen to read my posts, but I also know that it’s unfair to spew my emotion all over …
Aug 25
A Heavy Weight
I woke up this morning before the sun and thought of Erin. I was wide awake, thinking of her. For then, it was ok. I didn’t cry. I didn’t want to get myself all upset either. I wondered if she woke me up with her presence. Yesterday was hard. I have this heavy weight on …
Aug 24
More
Every new day brings with it more reminders and more of what are now just memories. Last night I went with Shaun to see Guardians of the Galaxy. I’m not sure if Erin wanted to see it. For some reason, she was wary of superheroes and didn’t watch many of those movies. Maybe she thought …
Aug 23
Today’s Erin Thoughts
It will continue to amaze me that everywhere I go, there is a thread of Erin. At least for me. I went to Publix to buy some thank you cards with Shaun, and as I walked in and saw the area they always put their seasonal stuff I thought of Erin. I looked at the …
Aug 22
Losing My Religion
Yesterday was an exceedingly bad day. I think I cried nearly all day. I have this awful feeling in my chest, and in the pit of my stomach. At one point I watched videos of Erin, the few that I had, on my phone. At the end of one, I sort of yelled at her …