Sep 13
I am starting this off with a surprise message I found from Erin yesterday. She had apparently gotten into one of my work binders, written what you see in the picture, and I found it yesterday as I was preparing to go to a business meeting. It made me smile. Then I realized that not …
Sep 11
This morning, so far, I am teetering on the brink of sadness and being OK. I think I am mostly OK. For now. I have just realized that I am being “gutted by fire” at the moment. Erin’s death left me empty enough already, and I had previously described myself as a house that had …
Sep 10
Or should I say, the Hampster. Erin always called her clothes hamper the hampster. As I was putting my own socks down the chute last night, I had to walk past her room and I thought of that. She had cute, silly nicknames for so many things. We had many funny stories about those to …
Sep 09
For the last hour, I have struggled. I started off the day pretty well this time. I only cried for a little bit. Then I fixed me some food, which required me to go into the kitchen. The first thing I saw was the cat sitting on the table. That’s a spot she loves, and …
Sep 09
I wasn’t sure what I was going to write this morning, because I have some other thoughts swirling around, but I think they need more time to cook before they come out. Yet here I am. So on to the Pain to Peace section taken from Turning the Corner on Grief Street, by Terri Daniel… …
Sep 08
Ah, what timing. As I begin typing this, a school bus arrives with the kids from next door, and just the idea that someone’s kids are coming home is downright painful for me. But that isn’t a reality that I can get away from, and I am glad their kids are safe and home. So …
Sep 08
I am not feeling so hot right now, which is why I picked up my “pen and paper” and got right to it this morning. The second point in the Pain to Peace chapter, is called We Invite In What We Would Usually Try to Avoid. Here is the sub text: “When faced with intense …
Sep 07
The title, Pain to Peace, is the title of a section of the book I mentioned yesterday (Turning the Corner on Grief Street by Terri Daniel). I read the entire book by the way already. It gave me some comfort, and it was constructive. She writes it from a higher perspective, so if you are …
Sep 06
Well I took no pictures of my hike. I don’t know why but I completely forgot. It was hot, and I am out of shape and thus was sweaty and out of breath when I got to the place where I knew I was going to sit for awhile. I ended up sitting in the …
Sep 05
I woke up around 4am to a dream, and a headache. I think the headache was sinus related, but the dream, gave me heartache. There was more to it than I remember, but I became consciously aware in the dream when I was riding in the back of a black SUV, being chauffeured by someone …